ONLINE UNIVERSITY INDEX:: BROTHERS ONLY:: Braincollege:: Things that make us men:The new brotherhood

Hi to you all, big bros and welcome to our secret forum.
Brothers, times are hard. Very hard. Hilary Clinton types have
filled the whole place once more. Chaps are doing things these
days. They're topping the class chart, they're picking up prizes,
they're taking quizzes and hitting records in spelling bees. Our
problems are big, bros. The world is changing and chaps are
changing too. Chaps want to even be priests and bishops
although real chaps know that's not cute. The nation's biggest
university is run by a chap, bros, a chap from up the mountain.
It's even said she'll take over from the president when he finally
bows out. That's tough climbing by a tough chap.
Wake up, bros. Chaps operate the web. They're the web's
most faithful users. This is sad because the web was our thing.
Remember our GI days in the first Gulf War. The internet was
our tool. Now chaps have put every recipe on it and they are
spreading their wings all over the place. We need to wake up.
Some crazy scientists even say chaps could make babies without
us! That's what the Biology teacher, a chap, said in a
reproduction lesson. You know the stuff called cloning, in situ
fertilization, test tube babies, designer babies et al? So bros,
we need to shape up. We need to redefine ourself as a race
under threat. (I forgot to mention that most of our school
principals are now chaps.) You see my point? Long gone are the
days when chaps used to sit back and watch us make the
headlines. Our generation must change the tide.
Bros, here's the new brotherhood. It's simple, practical and
slightly revolutionary. Perhaps it entails our rediscovering our
true vocation. But it's a must for real brothers...
1) Joseph
The Holy Book does not say if he is Joseph Wolfram, Joseph
Benson, Joseba Fereira, Joseph Awah or what. Simply Joseph.
God trusted Joseph. He lived his life to be trusted. We must
give God a chance to trust us by the virtues in our lives. He
saved the life of Mary. He didn't run his mouth to bring shame
on others. Let's hold our tongue. He worked hard. He fostered a
Child not his and he did it with loving devotion. With the kind
of life that chaps live these days, we may end up having to
foster a child whose father failed to be a real brother. Let's love
like Joseph. You could foster the next pope, who knows?
Joseph worked. He worked hard in his carpentry shop. He didn't
play tricks to grab wealth he did not deserve. He ennobled that
profession. Now you can proudly become a carpenter. There's
no mean profession. Joseph is in heaven. Chaps can be
everything but this Senior Big Brother Joseph is too much. He
didn't lift his voice over Mary. He didn't lift his hand either. The
greatest chap that ever lived loved him. We can be like Joseph.
2) Cuisine
Chaps claim to know the kitchen better. But the truth is that all
the chefs in the world's best hotels are brothers. We need to
keep that up. Every real brother must master the kitchen more
than a chap. That gives us a plus. Ask the big brothers who cook
meals occasionally in the house. Their chaps bow in front of
them with reverence because of their culinary feats. Every
brother must cuddle next to the flame and learn our traditional
cuisine while our mothers are still around. So that tomorrow
when we grow independent, chaps can admire us for the skills
we learnt in the kitchen during holidays which they cannot
match.

3) Respect
Some brothers do things that bring us shame in school. When a
brother challenges a legitimate school authority, our blood
bubbles. Respect is an asset similar to cash you put in a savings
account. The more respect you show, the more respect you
earn. The rate at which brothers accumulate Saturday
punishment due to poor respect issues is alarming. Real brothers
don't bone in front prefects and parents. Real brothers say "I'm
sorry. I will not do it again," with the head tilted to reveal the
soul's sorrow. You needn't be a coward to show respect. Rather,
it takes all the boldness you can afford to accept responsibility
for wrongdoing and have regard for others, even if you disagree
with them.
4) David
David walked to Goliath and stared at the monster without
blinking. He didn't complain "I've not been to military school, I've
not been to ENIA. Daddy favours other children." Be like David.
Face the Goliath that your future is. Don't say you've not been to
the best schools like your pals. Don't say old poppy doesn't give
you cash. Old boys and girls have done their part. We've got what
we've got and we've got to get to the top with that. That's what
David did. And that's why little ones can hear the story and smile
inside out. It's a sign of the new brotherhood.
5) Service to sisters
The new brotherhood dictates that we can no longer plot any
ungentlemanly act with other pals against sisters. We condemn
rape, threats and team work with sugar daddies to spoil soft
sisters. Now's the time to offer a soft sister our seat in a
crowded bus. It's time to report violence. It's time to play
Joseph. It's time to educate other brothers to keep our flag high.
6) Drop the gun
Tupac and Notorious B.I.G. are dead. We suppose they died with
all the violence. No hate. No gang. No gossip. No fight. We are all
brothers aiming to improve the community.
7) Be Mary
It's amazing how many Marys flocked around the Lord. We are
wrong to leave chaps to make up all the choir and the
congregation. We should be in church. Christian communities are
running holiday activities throughout this vacation. We should
swell the numbers and hear the Word that gives life. If we
boycott holy gatherings, then chaps' request for priestly
ordination may be justified. He chose us. Let's be in church.
8) No sex
No sex before, out of, without...marriage. No compromise.
HIV/AIDS lurks around every corner. "Belleh" brings shame and
stops your education prematurely. If a sister burns for it and you
can see telling signs, say a bold no. Avoid porn language and
pictures. Time is yours if you learn to wait. The new
brotherhood asks us to be virgins, even second virgins. Sisters
love brothers who've got self-control.
9) Johah
There's work in our wilderness of a world. Preach the stench and
disaster that HIV/AIDS is causing. Join the battle. Talk about it
and warn the community. Be like Jonah in the sin-soaked streets
of Nineveh.
10) R Kelly
You are the world's greatest, the mountain peak on high, the star
up in the sky. If somebody asks you who we are, just tell them
that. We are brothers, the first to be here, the chosen ones,
fishers of men, dignified, loving and destined for glory. Who can
change our fate?